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ceruleanscars

[ website | a crest of cold tears ]
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Former social obligation does not translate to ex best friend. [Apr. 23rd, 2010|01:49 am]
ceruleanscars
[emotion |over it]

Anyone who really knows me knows better than to turn on me over anything you say. Anyone who doesn't, I can do without. Nobody accused you of or tried to deny you anything, and your unprovoked attacks are just plain unfair because you don't even stick to the facts. I've given up trying to understand you. I tried so hard to make all of this right more than once, but every time I think it's over, it isn't. I expected better from you. How disappointing: You don't seem very brave in your "online" anonymity . . . like how the Ku Klux Klan wears masks. You weren't singled out. I think you completely missed the point of all these social networking sites. Everyone boasts of life's menial details and can follow whomever they choose. I think you severely over estimate your standing in the situation. My universe does not revolve around finding ways to rub my existence in your face. I'm sorry you're 30 and still struggling with life, but that has nothing to do with me and everything to do with the stupid decisions you continue to make. You and that boyfriend you cheat on (we all know about that, does he?) would have disposable income if you'd stop spending it on drugs. Bragging is only fun/acceptable amongst those actually capable of competing with you. It's pointless to boast BENEATH your realm of peers. Why the fuck would I bother to compete with/brag to you? You brag about the drugs you do and the makeup you buy, open your legs to anything that gives you 2 seconds of attention, barely made it out of high school, have had more abortions than anyone cares to keep track of, consistently date losers who treat you like garbage, and can't hold a job for more than 6 months at a time. We've never had much in common and you've always prided yourself on never letting me forget it. Don't you understand I don't consider you important enough for what you accuse me of? All you ever do is smoke pot, take thousands of overexposed badly photoshopped pictures of yourself, and whine about how someone else is always to blame for your shitty circumstances. You've no actual substance to befriend, brag to or compete with. Never mind that you forget to mention the 10 + years of money/stuff you borrowed and never gave back, the things you outright stole from me, and the fact that myself and whomever had the misfortune of actually wanting to be a good friend to you had to pay your sorry way 90% of the time we hung out. I might be a self centered bitch, but I have never EVER gone out of my way to be cruel to you. You are not worth the effort on my part because you are more than willing to cause harm to yourself on a daily basis. I feel really stupid for having to justify/defend my friendship with you to so many over the years. Turns out they were all right. You are vapid, jealous, and the bleakest kind of social parasite. I'm truly sorry I wasted so many years on you. Your over exaggerated attempt at character assassination only proves you so far beneath me I get vertigo just thinking about it...
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fairweather indeed [Apr. 18th, 2010|09:50 pm]
ceruleanscars
[emotion |disappointeddisappointed]
[Sound |Richard Skelton - Fold]

You must have a pretty terrible existence to go so far as to resent me for mine. I'm fairly certain you were not forced into reading any of my wall posts/tweets/blog against your will and I know for sure you were not contacted directly. Who the hell are you to be so bloody judgmental? Unfriend me in real life if I upset you that much, but please grow a bloody spine about it for fuck's sake. Are you really that starved for personal validation? I'm sorry if you feel I hurt you in some way, but did it ever occur to you to actually talk to me about it? Aren't we are all supposed to be adults now? You've treated me like a stranger for the past 6 months or so. Why is it so shocking that I now return the favor in kind? I've got nothing against you, but I'll be damned if I'm going to beg for your company. You allude to "good fortune" simply being handed to me, but you forget I've had stable employment since the age of 16. That's a pretty big factor in my being able to go cool places and have nice things. Doesn't make me a bad person. Doesn't mean I'm any better than you. Just means we're different and you have no right to hold it against me. Take a long hard look at yourself before you start passing such harsh judgment on others. This "good fortune" you speak of doesn't apply to anything you have to work your ass off to obtain. You of all people should know this. Stop acting like the world owes you and take responsibility for yourself. Your life is what you make out of it. I'm truly sorry you felt like you had to do it this way. I wish you well but I do not mourn you. Please take care of yourself. I hope you find happiness someday.
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shades of... [Mar. 27th, 2010|12:48 am]
ceruleanscars
[emotion |chipperchipper]
[Sound |Martin Grech - Open Heart Zoo]

I've come to the realization that wearing anything outside of the gray-scale spectrum feels like wearing a costume. Viva la gray-scale!!!
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i blame navi... [Jul. 17th, 2009|01:35 am]
ceruleanscars
[emotion |amusedamused]
[Sound |humanwine- fighting naked]

Photobucket

this makes me so happy for some reason.
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bonding [Jun. 29th, 2009|01:43 am]
ceruleanscars
[Sound |iamx- mercy]

Bleeding. A lot. Hakujin loves me. <3
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meow [Jun. 13th, 2009|01:15 am]
ceruleanscars
[emotion |chipperchipper]
[Sound |tori amos- give]

saw this on my way to work and just couldn't resist taking a couple of pictures. ha.


Photobucket

Photobucket
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I think I just swallowed my brain... [Jun. 12th, 2009|01:11 am]
ceruleanscars
[emotion |crankycranky]
[Sound |IAMX- kiss+swallow]

Processor up to 3.06GHz3
Memory up to 8GB
Hard drive up to 500GB



specs on the new macbook pros are amazing. kinda makes mine look like a piece of crap in comparison... this must be the tech equivalent to penis envy.... *womp womp*
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not dead just preoccupied [Apr. 28th, 2009|02:05 am]
ceruleanscars
[place |home]
[emotion |bouncybouncy]
[Sound |muse]

I bought a new bike today. Real content later. *squee*

Photobucket
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Today is our four year anniversary. [Jan. 29th, 2009|01:01 am]
ceruleanscars
[emotion |indescribableindescribable]

This day I will marry my best friend. The one I laugh with, live for, dream with, love.
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a smile to my face and a tear to my eye [Dec. 18th, 2008|09:12 pm]
ceruleanscars
[emotion |gratefulgrateful]

I got an email form my mom today just talking about some of the smaller, tedious things we need to do before the wedding. I never would have been able to do any of this by myself. I am so blessed.

"This is such a labor of love... I am enjoying every minute of this. You know that Nani would be in the middle of all this & we would have been done by Halloween if she were here. But that's ok. She is still with us in spirit, I can feel her sometimes and I know she would be proud of us. She would absolutely adore Scott.
Better get back to work. I love you so much."

That part made me cry in a rather nice way. I seriously have the most amazing Mom in the world. My sister and I were so lucky to have her.



Nani, I miss you everyday. Mom and I are better people because of you. You are loved more than you will ever know.
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